Larocque and Roll

Shutting down my brain August 30, 2005

Tonight, I am making the decision to turn the computer off (except to post this, and who knows - I may get sucked in anyways) and do something different. Like, knitting and watching a movie, or reading, or going for a walk, or baking something.

I’ve spent too much time lately trying to put things in order or clean up little messes and making other messes in the process. There are only so many decisions you can make at a time before your brain gets stuck in a feedback loop, where every time you sit down and try and put it into neutral, it just starts repeating a message that sounds suspiciously like a mother nagging you to get up and go clean your room and do the dishes and vacuum or write a book report (I’m woefully behind on that - sorry) or post pictures or something - just don’t sit there doing nothing!

The last straw came last night when I went to bed. My dreams were all about trying to accomplish various tasks so I could chill for a while, but they never seemed to end. The highlight had to be surfacing from the dream, remembering that I needed to water the geese and walk the camel. I woke up thinking, “Wait - geese? I have a camel?” It wasn’t even quarter after 6 and already I was stressed out trying to figure out where I put the camel.

So tonight I am going to park my brain at the door and tell the nagging voice to take a long walk off a short pier. I will ignore the last load of laundry I need to do (towels), and put the clean clothes that are folded on my dining room table in a basket and hide it somewhere I won’t need to look at it. I will go for a walk, come home and haul out my knitting and watch “Kung Fu Hustle” or a few episodes of “Firefly” or “The Fellowship of the Ring” with the actor’s commentary, or - what the hell - do all of that. I just won’t do anything that will lead to more work which needs to be done RIGHT NOW.

If you’ll excuse me, I need to go look in my storage locker for the geese. They’re getting thirsty, after all.