I was browsing a list of recently published documents from the Government of Canada [1], and at first glance, I saw what I thought was the Coolest. Document. Ever. Unfortunately, I reread the title and it wasn’t nearly as exciting as I had first thought. What was actually “Be Careful With Lighters and Matches” I had read as…
…”Be Careful With Lightsabres and Machetes”
Tell me – how awesome would that be if the Canadian Government commisioned and published a document on lightsabre and machete safety? It would probably have stuff like:
- When turning on your lightsaber, make sure the light part is facing away from you.
- Do not throw your lightsabre, unless you can use The Force to control its trajectory.
- Under no circumstances should you operate your lightsabre or machete if you have been consuming alcohol or other judgement-imparing substances.
- Be careful when using your machete to break open coconuts – you might end up cutting off more than the fiberous outter shell!
I am totally open to other suggestions as to what would be in such a document.
[1] We’re a depository library, which means we get to order and house government documents.
I fear that, were it a government document, it would e full of legalese and all the fun would be sucked right out of it. There’d be a lot of aforesaids and heretos and thereins, and by the end of it I wouldn’t even want to play with my lightsabre anymore.
I used to work in government documents…I can’t think about it without cringing.
Hee hee.
Dave plays with his lightsaber.
Sorry.
That IS kinda low-brow.