The last two weeks, I’ve been feeling off my game. Mostly, I’m tired and unfocused and I just can’t seem to accomplish anything useful at all. It’s taken what feels like a massive effort to haul myself out of bed and get to work, where I get nothing accomplished. And then I have dance class or go to the gym or work and don’t make it home until after 7, at which point I’m too tired to make good food choices ². Finally, on Sunday I’d had enough and started thinking about how to snap myself out of it. While sitting at the kitchen table drinking my coffee and trying to make a list, I saw a bunch of very ripe bananas, and a light bulb went off. Baking!

Baking has many elements that I could use to yank myself out of the slump. There is a very precise list of materials that need to be assembled; there are specific pieces of equipment that must be used; there is a list of instructions that need to be followed; there is a time limit in which the task must be accomplished; and there is a reward upon completion of the task. A delicious, delicious reward (that I mostly give away).

Sunday afternoon, I whipped up a batch of classic scones and some banana bread (with the ripe bananas). Tonight I made dairy-free zucchini bread (because a co-worker is very allergic to dairy)³ It’s still a little too soon to tell if it’s working, but I have started to make a mental list of some small jobs that I can do tomorrow. Best to start small.

And have a slice of zucchini bread.

1. There was one memorable week where I baked three loaves of zucchini bread, two loaves of carrot bread, a chocolate zucchini cake, oatmeal cookies and chocolate chip banana muffins.
2. I realize this is probably part of the problem – and I’m working on it.
3. It’s the recipe in The Joy of Cooking, and it happens to not call for milk or butter.

However, I want to recap the things that made me happy, that brought little bits of joy and colour into my life last year¹.

1. Dave’s MM6. Every year, this guy puts on an epic movie marathon and invites friends to submit a slate of movies for the rest of us to vote on. And then we vote, and then Dave does tabulations and makes spreadsheets and scores things – and then posts the results. Finally, we all trek to Ottawa to crash at his and Sarah’s place for 24 hours while we watch movies, tweet, blog, take pictures and make fan movies. This year, my third, I managed to stay awake for all but an hour and forty-five minutes of it, INCLUDING the WTFery that was “Human Centipede.” Good job, guys!

2. Decatur, Georgia. How much does my job suck that I got sent to a conference in Decatur, Georgia in April? When it was still in the minus digits in North Bay, low plus digits in southern Ontario, it was in the twenties the five days I was there! And the food²! And the bars! And the lovely people! I can’t speak of it but to gush, and would love to go back there some day.

3. My nephew and niece. Delightful children, they are. Cute as buttons, smart and creative. I didn’t get to visit with them as much as I would have liked to, but through the power of the interwebs, I was kept up to date with lots of pictures and phone calls. They even came to visit for a long weekend in August!

4. My sweater. After much dithering and distraction, I finally managed to knit myself a sweater. (Technically, it’s the third sweater I knit. The first didn’t fit me so I gave to my mom, and the second was for my niece.)

5. Fancy Ladies Night. I can’t believe I haven’t blogged about this before³. Just over a year ago, two friends and I vowed to create an event once a month that would allow us to get dressed up in our fanciest outfits and do something swanky. For a smallish northern town⁴ we have an abundance of nice restaurants that serve outstanding food, including one place that does exclusive invite-only tasting menus every few months (and guess who got on the list?)⁵ We’ve also done two Fancy Ladies Stay In, where they come here and we end up eating and drinking all night long, which is also fun.

Do I have any resolutions for this year? Not really. I want to take at least one day a week where I don’t turn on the TV and another day where I don’t turn on my computer (although my iPod is an exception so I can listen to podcasts or music.) And to try and update this thing more often.

1. The funny thing is, the more I started to think of the highlights, the more highs I remembered and the more the bad, stressy stuff got pushed to the back of my mind. This is a good thing.
2. OH MY GOD THE FOOD! I can’t adequately describe it all, but the highlight was The Iberian Pig, a tapas place that serves jamon iberico, a special kind of ham imported from Spain that’s only available in a very few locations in the US.
3. Or maybe I can, given how rare it’s been that I’ve blogged at all over the last little while.
4. Official motto: Just north enough to be perfect! Unofficial motto: Smallest of the big northern 5!
5. To be honest, it’s not that hard to get on the list. You just have to put your name on a mailing list, but I like to make it sound REALLY SWANK.

What I actually did: puttered around on the computer for an hour and a half.

And I wonder why it takes me forever to finish any of my knitting projects?

Right now is not that moment.

(Here’s a hint: it involves work, some travel and a lot of wanting to throw things.)

1. My parent’s cat, actually – not mine.

So, this year I will gracefully decline to participate, and simply wish all the participants good luck and good writing.

1. Basically, I just keep working on the same story, over and over, adding new parts each year.

However, the greatest sin as far as I’m concerned is this: female characters who fight, either with weapons or in hand-to-hand combat in full makeup with their hair down, in short skirts or otherwise impractical outfits and high, pointy heels. Men, I don’t know if you realize this, but that’s bullshit. It’s nearly impossible to run for any distance or length of time in any sort of heel, let alone ones with spike heels³ The outfits are implausible for several reasons, including limited flexibility, equipment failure⁴ and the fact that no one ever seems to sweat or get grubby. Hell, whenever I fetch something out of the stacks at work I come back with dust or something on some part of my being.

And the hair thing? Mine isn’t all that long, and I’m a librarian, meaning the scariest thing I fight on any given day is the urge to roll my eyes at some of the excuses people give for not wanting to pay their fines. But there are times when I’m trying to hook up a VCR/DVD player/projector/computer or searching for cases or paper or barcodes and it’s all in my face and I just want to cut it off. Why do the powers that be insist on making them fight with it all in their faces?

I stopped watching Alias because of this, and pretty much any movie with Angelina Jolie. It’s also what I love about Olivia on Fringe – that she wears practical clothing and footwear and her hair pulled back when she’s working and still manages to be extremely capable at her job⁵

So, we came up with a list of female characters on film who seemed to buck this trend:

• Ripley, from the Alien movies
• EVE, from WALL-E (yeah, she counts!)
• Tank Girl
• Sorsha from Willow
• Princess Leia
• The Bride from the Kill Bill movies (with the same reservations as Olivia and Zoe)

Who else?

1. Hawaii 5-0 reboot, I’m looking at you.
2. John Hannah, whom I adore, does this in the Mummy movies – his accent keeps slipping from Scottish to English and it’s distracting.
3. Guys – try this: stand on your tiptoes and put a roll of dimes under your heel. Now, try balancing on that roll of dimes. Hard, isn’t it? Try running in those, and then imagine trying to kick someone’s ass.
4. Such as runs in nylons, torn hems, popped buttons, etc.
5. I have a theory about why, even when you have a female character who kicks ass, she has to have long hair, as if it’s some kind of acknowledgement that although she’s busy busting shit up in a sensible outfit, she’s still a sex object. This also applies to Zoe on Firefly.

When I brought my basket downstairs and started sorting it, I discovered a sad, lonely little pile that I’d forgotten last time (my splash pants, workout shorts, socks, a hoodie) and designated it the first pile to go in. I’d almost finished throwing it in the washer when I noticed there was something on the floor beside the splash pants, so I turned to take a better look and then shrieked like the girl I am.

It was a mouse. Dead, fortunately, because I don’t know what I would have done if it was alive¹. I finally managed to pull myself together and dispose of it, after having poked it several times with a broom to make good and sure it was dead because yo, those little buggers can JUMP².

I’m not sure what worries me more: that there was a dead mouse in my laundry or that my laundry was toxic enough to kill a living creature³

1. I suspect screaming and jumping about until I either succeeded in scaring the mouse off or hitting my head on any number of low hanging things on the basement ceiling.
2. There is a story about Bing bringing me a very not-dead mouse in the middle of the night once, and it ran up the curtain on my closet. I tried to knock it down with a broom so Bing could “take care of it” but it jumped at me. From several feet away. And almost landed on me.
3. Oh, I’m not really surprised there are mice – you can’t live in a house this old at this time of year without having a few, although I’ve seen very little evidence of them.

Dave’s much anticipated Movie Marathon was a few weeks back, and it was a highly enjoyable 24 hours (as usual). I can’t add much to what Dave and Jorge already said, except that I TOTALLY called who patient zero was in [REC] before anyone else, and I was only one of three people to make it all the way through Human Centipede.² For the record, I’m not proud of that accomplishment – it’s an hour and a half of my life I want scrubbed from my memory banks.

This intense glut of movie watching has lead to a flurry of my own movie watching lately. This weekend alone, I watched Iron Man 2 (meh), John Carpenter’s The Thing (love!), The Spirit (hate!), Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow (love! – with some reservations³ ). I also started watching Six Reasons Why and Primer through Netflix, and intend to go back and finish them sometime soon.

(Here’s the thing: I’m quite enjoying my Netflix subscription. Sure, there’s not a lot of current programs on, and you have to be willing to explore what’s there. I’ve discovered a few programs that were new to me and have loved, a few I knew about – and hadn’t watched – and hated them, and others I knew about but hadn’t been able to watch when they were on and am now all caught up. The function I would like to see available in Netflix Canada, and from what I hear it’s available elsewhere, is a wishlist queue, or somewhere I can tag movies or shows I want to watch later in case I can’t find them later. Right now, the closest thing to that is watching five or ten minutes of it so that it’s in my recently watched queue. The major drawback of that is that the queue gets cleared at the end of the month, so I have to log into my account online the see what I started watching.⁴ )

But I’m still reading. Real books, and maybe a few ebooks occasionally. Maybe that will be next month’s post.

1. tm Gilmore Girls
2. And, as I took great pains to point out, the creation wasn’t a centipede – it was a millipede. This is because it had two limbs per segment and it moved slowly. So there.
3. Namely, I find it too campy in spots, if that’s possible.
4. If this were Twitter, it would have a hastag of #firstworldproblem.

So, in brief, you are spared hearing about how sick I was. In retrospect, not that much but I’m a lousy sick person.

However, you will not be spared hearing about how I had written a post about being sick and then didn’t post it, but then wrote about not writing about it. Oooo – I’m all meta right now!

I will say this about being sick: it did afford me lots of time to do nothing but sit around, knit and watch movies. Normally when I try to take a day off to do something like this, a nagging little voice in my head compels me to do productive things, like doing the dishes, doing laundry, sweeping the floors, dusting, reorganizing something, etc. and before I know it I’ve spent the day being productive instead of relaxing. ² Whenever I tried to do any of the above while sick, I’d quickly realize I just didn’t have the energy, and didn’t my couch look like a great place for a nap, and oh – is there *another* episode of Criminal Minds on? Bring on the nap!

(It also afforded me the opportunity to clean a big chunk of unwatched shows off my PVR. I was waaaaay behind on Stargate: Universe, Bones and Fringe.)

Resolution update:

I’m not much further along on anything. I’m working on a striped scarf and have added over a foot to it, and even though I should be working on something else, I’m still adding inches to my cardigan (ideally, I want it done by Easter). No more wine has been consumed, but I did consume a lovely mocha porter from Lake of Bays Brewing Company.

1. I was ranting about children, water bottles and germs. None of it made sense.
2. Don’t get me wrong – sometimes all of these things help me focus my energy and it’s a good thing.